Hi! Massive overwork doesn’t end for another week and a half, but got a chance to poke my head up long enough to read your collection – which really made a nice break.
I really liked the idea of this, and I liked you carried across this outsider perspective.
In no particular order…
I LOVED the Isis one. You totally, completely suckered me on that one. I love the reality-optional quirks in Yugioh, and the idea that after living in an underground grotto her entire life, at about 22 or 23, Isis somehow becomes the curator of something that’s clearly meant to be the Cairo Museum is just so delightfully wtf? So I was chuckling along with her coworker’s description of her, because it was so on target with what I think here coworkers must have been thinking. So there I am laughing, right up to the moment the car crashes into him. It was such a coolly executed twist!
I liked the contrasting views of Kaiba. The one with the boy really worked nicely, fleshed out. I loved Kaiba sort of coolly insulting a guy pointing a gun at him. And I really liked that you had Kaiba take out the guy without using weapons himself. It’s amazing how many djs and fanfics have Kaiba carrying a gun, when it’s incredibly clear (possibly because of his revulsion for KC’s making weapons) that Kaiba prefers makeshift weapons like briefcases and cards – or relying on martial arts. The one nit-picky thing I might suggest is that I’m not sure a boy the age of the narrator, would use the words. “He was attractive” It seems he’d focus more on how no one makes him cut his hair or his cool clothes – like you did in the next paragraph – that sounded so much like a kid. I also liked how the kid’s like: Duh everyone knows KC makes games, not weapons. I think I liked it because it showed that even though Kaiba can’t let go of his past, for a whole new generation, it doesn’t exist. And Kaiba from the cop’s pov is just wonderful. You’ve caught the Death-T Seto so well, that sense of someone feral, someone for whom the ordinary rules don’t apply.
I liked the HP Seto one too, because you caught on something that never gets explored – how people felt about this powerful stray being mentored by Akunadin. And I like the suspicion with which he is regarded, the sense that he’s unpredictable.
The Gozaburo one was wonderfully ironic, it really caught the public vs. private side of him. I think that must have contributed to Seto’s cynicism, the idea that everyone thought of Gozaburo as a humanitarian.
I loved the Yugi one too – from his mother’s pov. Again, you took something I always wondered about and brought it to life perfectly. This was another of my favorites. Ironically, it was so perfectly done, there isn’t more to say than that.
I think the one I think needs some work is the Mokuba one, partly because it’s the only one where I don’t know the pov. It doesn’t sound like a kid, who would probably think Mokuba had it made… possibly it was a teacher or an adult?
The teacher ones were very good. Each time they really provided a different perspective that made sense, like the teacher not believing that Jounouchi had really changed. And the one with Bakura was funny – where he doesn’t get why everyone thinks he’s shy and respectful – and you realize that those teachers have Ryou in their class, not the thief kind. The paragraph where you describe him, “Death-white hair. Eyes the color of an old bloodstain…” was great imagery.
Oh well, time to get back to working… It was really nice to read this!
no subject
I really liked the idea of this, and I liked you carried across this outsider perspective.
In no particular order…
I LOVED the Isis one. You totally, completely suckered me on that one. I love the reality-optional quirks in Yugioh, and the idea that after living in an underground grotto her entire life, at about 22 or 23, Isis somehow becomes the curator of something that’s clearly meant to be the Cairo Museum is just so delightfully wtf? So I was chuckling along with her coworker’s description of her, because it was so on target with what I think here coworkers must have been thinking. So there I am laughing, right up to the moment the car crashes into him. It was such a coolly executed twist!
I liked the contrasting views of Kaiba. The one with the boy really worked nicely, fleshed out. I loved Kaiba sort of coolly insulting a guy pointing a gun at him. And I really liked that you had Kaiba take out the guy without using weapons himself. It’s amazing how many djs and fanfics have Kaiba carrying a gun, when it’s incredibly clear (possibly because of his revulsion for KC’s making weapons) that Kaiba prefers makeshift weapons like briefcases and cards – or relying on martial arts. The one nit-picky thing I might suggest is that I’m not sure a boy the age of the narrator, would use the words. “He was attractive” It seems he’d focus more on how no one makes him cut his hair or his cool clothes – like you did in the next paragraph – that sounded so much like a kid. I also liked how the kid’s like: Duh everyone knows KC makes games, not weapons. I think I liked it because it showed that even though Kaiba can’t let go of his past, for a whole new generation, it doesn’t exist. And Kaiba from the cop’s pov is just wonderful. You’ve caught the Death-T Seto so well, that sense of someone feral, someone for whom the ordinary rules don’t apply.
I liked the HP Seto one too, because you caught on something that never gets explored – how people felt about this powerful stray being mentored by Akunadin. And I like the suspicion with which he is regarded, the sense that he’s unpredictable.
The Gozaburo one was wonderfully ironic, it really caught the public vs. private side of him. I think that must have contributed to Seto’s cynicism, the idea that everyone thought of Gozaburo as a humanitarian.
I loved the Yugi one too – from his mother’s pov. Again, you took something I always wondered about and brought it to life perfectly. This was another of my favorites. Ironically, it was so perfectly done, there isn’t more to say than that.
I think the one I think needs some work is the Mokuba one, partly because it’s the only one where I don’t know the pov. It doesn’t sound like a kid, who would probably think Mokuba had it made… possibly it was a teacher or an adult?
The teacher ones were very good. Each time they really provided a different perspective that made sense, like the teacher not believing that Jounouchi had really changed. And the one with Bakura was funny – where he doesn’t get why everyone thinks he’s shy and respectful – and you realize that those teachers have Ryou in their class, not the thief kind. The paragraph where you describe him, “Death-white hair. Eyes the color of an old bloodstain…” was great imagery.
Oh well, time to get back to working… It was really nice to read this!
Talk to you later…